Thursday, June 30, 2011

Your Drunken Update of the Day

Holy shit, bitches!!!!  The Gorgeous Lynn of the infamous "I Hate Jill Zarin Blog" sent Mz. Chick a direct message on twater last night (oh, yes she did!), letting Mz. Chick know that she'll feature Mz. Chick's retelling of the shit storm from yesterday.  And she did (you can read all about it here)!  Which explains why Mz. Chick's twater exploded with all the new friends and mentions.  Not only that, she is following Mz. Chick!  Move over, the Divine Mz. McCord, because Mz. Chick has a new twater best friend!  Mz. Chick's goal to becoming a Twater Fame Whore has just become within reach!  Thank you The Gorgeous Lynn!

Mz. Chick would like to thank all of her fellow drunken bitches for the kind comments and twater joins.  Just so people know (because Mz. Chick has had multiple emails and messages about this): anyone is welcome to repost any of the shit that comes out her mouth (which her ass is totally jealous of), whether here or on twater.  Mz. Chick only asks that a link back be included.

Mz. Chick also spent a lot of time yesterday cursing and redesigning the look of this blog.  She doesn't know what the fuck is wrong with the Facebook gadget, but has decided it is Facebook's fault, not hers.  Anyway, she hopes you all enjoy the changes.

One other thing before we get into today's update: Mz. Chick will be twating and writing down her and her fellow drunken bitches reactions to tonight's episode of the Real Housebitches.  She will try to post an update tonight about it, so check back later!

Mz. Chick's goal in life is to post this picture as many times as possible.
Mz. Zarin is very quiet today...and you know Mz. Chick is hitting refresh on that bitches Facebook as much as possible.  She even has an open web page on Mz. Zarin's twater (because the bitch blocked Mz. Chick from following her.  The nerve!).  As of now, she hasn't posted anything on her Facebook, and only posted this on her twater:



Hypocrite, much, Mz. Zarin?  After all, didn't you call The Divine Mz. McCord a "fucking bitch" (mean, vulgar) who was attending a wedding "above her status" (mean)?  Not to mention the whole shit storm from yesterday (MEAN!).  Furthermore, of all the House Bitches on that show, you seem to get bleeped the most (you wouldn't be able to follow Mz. Chick if she were on that show because everything that comes out of her mouth would be bleeped).  Like Mz. Chick said yesterday, you are a silly bitch.  Now, post some more fucked-up shit so that way Mz. Chick can get even more Twater famous, damn you!

And if you are wondering why Mz. Zarin's numbers on the Twater are increasing instead of decreasing today, you can buy followers.  Of course, Mz. Chick has no actual proof that Jill "The Bitch" Zarin is doing this, however, in her drunken state, this is the most reasonable conclusion.  Which leads Mz. Chick into another thought: how fucking pathetic to you have to be to buy followers?

I'm a Vanderbilt, bitch, don't talk to me about class!
Last night, the lovely Anderson Cooper took a swipe at several House Bitches on his show (specifically, those who "sing").  However, he saved his most bitchy comments for the Countless.  After trashing her "title" (she is in line for the throne after that scandal with The Burger King, don't ya know) he went after her, um, "singing" abilities.  Best line of the night: "If you're talking about class, and you are not referring to a room with kids in it, you have none."  If you missed it, you can watch it here, courtesy of Gawker.

Do NOT try to start shit with crazy eyes.
Ramona Singer, one of my favorite fellow drunken bitches, proved once again that she is not above stirring up some shit on the twater.  Here is what she re-twitted, twated, WHAT THE FUCK EVER last night:

Rt "@tcm007: @Bethenny follows 11 people @LynnNChicago is one of them @jillzarin did you block her? @ramonasinger @mccordalex @Bravotv"

Of course, Jill "The Bitch" Zarin never responded.  Mz. Zarin will shortly be shouting at Bobby about how Mz. Zinger (ha-ha!  That was a typo, but Mz. Chick decided to leave it like that, because that is some funny shit) is cyber-bullying her

The Divine Mz. McCord
Andy Cohen must have gotten sick of all the twats directed at him concerning when The Divine Mz. McCord would be on Watch What Happens Live.  He twated that she will be on next week.  It's about time, Mz. Andy!  Is it just Mz. Chick, or do others believe that Mz. Andy favors Mz. Zarin?  Or is it he is just afraid of Mz. Zarin's lawyers?

In Other News....
  • Usually, Mz. Chick doesn't engage in politics.  Even she is above all that nonsense.  However, be warned bitches, do not waste a good glass of wine by dumping it on Mrs. Glen Beck, or Mr. Glen Beck will sick his brain damaged minions on you. Of course, it was just an accident, darling.  Who would anyone waste such good wine on that fool's wife?
  • Harrison Ford called someone a fucking idiot.  God love him.  Have a glass of wine on me, you crazy man-bitch!
  • PSA by Mz. Chick: "There is no poop fairy." 
  • Mr. Hansen needs to have a seat over there, because he was caught, via hidden video, cheating on his wife.  The man-whore!


Top Ten Drunken Twits..Twats, Whatever Of The Day
If you would like to submit your twit, twat, whatever for Mz. Chick's consideration, you can join her on twitter.  If it is truly hilarious, DM her as well so she doesn't miss it.
  1. LynnNChicago (Twitter Page): Nice work on that Jill Zarin Facebook story! Love it! Suck It @JillZarin Screen shots don't lie! (Yes, bitches, the GORGEOUS Lynn twatted to Mz. Chick!)
  2. CnutInAKattan (Twitter Page): I just love how much classier everything sounds in a foreign language -- yahabibi, ma cherie ... all that shit. Cultured as fuck. (Cultured as fuck.  What Mz. Chick aspires to be.)
  3. LitSnitch (Twitter Page ): Fine, have it your way. No dismembered bodies on the Booze River Cruz. (Party pooper.)
  4. cellabella1 (Twitter Page ): Hahaha #fuckwhore! Only when i forget to take my bipolar med..then i just slap myself on the ass (What is it they say?  When you want a job done right, do it youself!)
  5. meekat81 (Twitter Page): TODAYS WEIGHTLOSS TIP: USE SUPERGLUE AS LIPGLOSS!! (Darling, how am I supposed to drink my wine?)
  6. mlaw3 (Twitter Page ): Well that was the easiest duty (haha doodie) ever. DrunkMommy proclaims tonight leftover night! (Mz. Chick approves of drunken parenting.  Cheers, darling!)
  7. JustMe411 (Twitter Page): A moth just flew in my hair.... i freaked the fuck out...i totally hate moths (It is Jill Zarin's fault.  Everything is that bitches fault.)
  8. yelobrckrd (Twitter Page): @MzElizaChick it is perfectly acceptable to cry over spilt wine. (Damned right!)
  9. maxndprincesmom (Twitter Page): @BaileysLaura lol i'll hit the wine bottle early <wink>  (Early?  Mz. Chick says that there is no such thing as "to early" when it comes to wine.)
  10. plainviewsue (Twitter Page): @CountessLuAnn If u think you can sing, u are as delusional as Kelly (Next thing you know, she'll be downing jelly beans while shouting out "satchels of gold!")

    2 comments:

    1. Mz Chick, I hated to be called a bitch when I was younger. Now I love it; I earned it! Love the blog & predict you will, indeed, become a fame whore. Sorry, can't follow you on Twitter. I twat for no one.
      Rhetorica

      ReplyDelete
    2. Damn straight, my drunken bitch! Mz. Chick approves of your prediction, and I understand about not twating for anyone...after all, some drunken bitches have standards!

      Thanks for reading!

      ReplyDelete